THE UNCLASSIFIED GET SMART SITE

The Old Quiz on the Website Trick

Just how big a Get Smart fan are you? Test yourself and see where you stand in the ranks of GS fandom. Don't worry... there are no grades here!

Questions:

1. When it comes to reciting things from memory, you can:
A) Say your ABCs
B) Recite the Gettysburg Address, Mark Antony's monologue in Julius Caesar, and a few catch-phrases like "And loving it" and "sorry about that"
C) You can recite the script to "Perils in a Petshop" in your sleep.

2. The stingy company you work for finally gave out holiday bonuses. You spend it on:
A) The Poly-sci Prof. that you're trying to bribe.
B) Xmas presents and the now marked down Max and 99 dolls at Toys R' Us.
C) You use it to pay off last month's Visa bill which was spent entirely on "99's Compact" which you won on Ebay.

3. Your Friday evening is spent:
A) By either having bad dates or bad Margaritas at The Metropolis Dance Club.
B) Unfortunately at work, but while you're there, you use your company's internet access to check out the newest Get Smart sites.
C) In the Get Smart chat room while also keeping tabs on the bidding war you're in on Ebay for a Don Adams TV Guide.

4. When it comes to writing research papers, you:
A) Either download one off of the 'net or buy one off of your brainy brother
B) Attempt to insert a tiny Get Smart reference -even if the paper is on deconstructing Joyce's "A Portrait of the Artist a Young Man."
C) Turn in a ten page Psych paper on the gender roles portrayed in Get Smart.

5. It's Halloween and in the spirit of the holiday, you:
A) Go to work dressed as a witch so that everyone gets the right impression about you from the start.
B) Put on a trench coat and carry a plastic squirt gun as a prop. The "old cheap secret agent costume trick."
C) Emulate your favorite Kaos agent -complete with a leather jacket and phony scars.

6. It's Karaoke on Campus Day! You:
A) Do a solo on "Mary Had a Little Lamb" just to show off your musical talent.
B) Bribe your friends to sing the Austin Powers theme song with you.
C) Complain to the Dean of students that the DJ did not have "Max" or "99" by Barbara Feldon.

*Sorry: "Wouldn't be caught dead singing in public" is not an applicable answer to this question.

7. The qualities you look for in a significant other include:
A) Not a lot -they just have to be able to tell time and have a job.
B) They must never tape over your Get Smart tapes or donate your GS paperbacks to the library.
C) They absolutely have to own the GS episodes you're missing -that's all that matters!

8. When it comes to current events you:
A) Think Timor is a dental adhesive.
B) Think it's interesting that the idiocy portrayed in Get Smart is prevalent in many of today's organizations and institutions.
C) Are at the edge of your seat with anticipation over all the talk about a new Get Smart movie.

9. The idea of a new Get Smart feature film is being tossed around by Hollywood big shots.
A) It only matters if it includes a soundtrack by Brittany Spears and Ricky Martin and stars Sarah Michelle Geller.
B) You wonder what McDonald's will use as a promo toy? McShoephones?
C) Can't wait for it to get to the theaters -you're already floating a loan to get tickets to the premiere.

10. When it comes to quizzes you:
A) Think that people who write them are idiots -just like the people who read them.
B) Wonder why you found this Get Smart quiz when you were trying to find a quiz that would test your knowledge of the show.
C) Have answered 'C' to every question.

Click here for the answers