The Unclassified Get Smart Site Proudly Presents the Valley
of the Dolls
T h a
t F i g u r e s !
Editor: It should be those figures.
Webmaster: Shaddap! I'm making a pun while I poke
fun!
There's nothing quite like fame of the plastic variety.
Yes, I'm speaking of collectible action figures a.k.a dolls, a.k.a expensive
toys meant to be left in their pretty little boxes. Well, I'm a bad girl. I took
my toys out and played with them. What follows is something of a record of Max,
99 and the Chief's plastic likenesses. If there's a Get Smart figure out there
that I don't have listed, give me a holler at webmasterATilovegetsmart.com
(replace AT with the @ 'cause we don't do spam bots here). My nosey self would like to know about it.
Dolly Follies:
Exclusive Premiere Limited Edition Collectors
Series
(rights granted by CBS).
| Arriving just in time for Christmas 1998,
the Exclusive Premiere Limited Edition Collectors
Series Max and 99 were the first
Get Smart figures in thirty odd years. To sum things up, this idea fell flat.
The dolls had many problems (listed in the chart below). Found only in Toys R'
Us, Max and 99 were available for $9.95 a piece. A few months later The Smarts
could be found in the clearance bin for a whopping $4.99. Currently they can be
purchased on ebay where people are still panting to get rid of
them. |
|
|
|
Physical Glitches |
|
Appearance Gaffes |
- Both dolls came with flat display stands. Neither doll
could stand on or off the stand. The 99 was especially prone to collapsing
as she was rather top heavy.
- The shape of Max's hand would not allow him to hold his shoe phone accessory.
- Max didn't have any sleeves under his jacket -serious!
|
- 99 has brown eyes? Is Barbara Feldon aware of this?
- This particular plastic representation of 99 is quite curvaceous.
Perhaps too curvaceous.
- 99 has been accused by some of looking like she's been sucking on a
lemon.
- Max looks... well... he looks insane.
|
|
|
Finally, one thing that really bugged me was 99's bulging trench coat. She's bundled
up like an Eskimo. Where's she going? Upper Siberia? Or.... does she use all
that bulky space to store her Control Issue Tommy guns? Underneath the coat
she's wearing a long sleeved turtleneck. *sigh* Why couldn't Max get a real
shirt too? Talk about cutting corners - or in this case, sleaves. |
Who's that Girl: The 99 Doll
|
|
This "12" Celebrity "Knockoff" doll
was made in Japan in 1967 and has been described as "Mego-like."
Whatever that means. It's either a Mego or it isn't.
The doll was once thought to
be rare, but it was really rooted in a scam. According to Chief Carl
the
company that made these dolls never got permission to use Barbara Feldon's
image. He has more info on the doll on his page. Actually, this doll does not even remotely resemble 99.
It's just a plastic doll with brown hair. Check
out the full body picture on Pete's
page.
According to some sources, the
99 doll in all its graven image blasphemy, is worth
about $500. According the guy on Ebay I bought my fantastic plastic 99
from, the David Spurgeon Celebrity Doll book prices these at $200-400 MIB. Most competitors on Ebay try to sell her for $200.
It's kind of ironic this hustle has endured.
Other
"Knockoff" dolls were made! Ahhhhhh!!! Those characters included Janice Rand of Star Trek, Jane Hathaway of the Beverly Hillbillies
and Tara King of The Avengers.
|
|
Sideshow Toys
In October of 2002 the world was graced with the highly accurate renditions
of Max and the Chief --brought to you by Sideshow Toys!
|
|
Max Stats |
|
Chief Stats |
| Max stands 12"
Accessories: shoephone, gun and a portable Cone of Silence.
Clothes: Max is wearing a blue Oxford shirt and a
dark blue suit capped
off with a removable neck-tie. In fact, all Max's clothes are removable
and I'm willing to bet he could wear G.I. Joe's fatigues. Sorry, Ken is
out.
Details: There are indeed a lot -right down to the veins on his
hand. Three cheers to Sideshow for getting Max's mocha eyes and physiognomy
down to the wire.
Price: Runs the gamut! Ebayers first sold these for about $46.00 but I've
seen them on Ebay as low as $3.25.
|
The Chief stands 12"
Accessories: golf shoephone and a portable Cone of Silence.
Clothes: The Chief is wearing the same light gray slacks and gray
tweedish coat he wore in nearly every episode of Get Smart. Like Max, the
socks, shoes and everything else is removable.
Details: Except for the head, the body is the same as Max. I am most
impressed with how well this action figure resembles Ed Platt. It's just
about eerie.
Price: Same as deal as Max. On average the current Ebay asking price
is $17.00. Originally Max and the Chief could only be bought for a $69.00
set.
|
The Sideshow
Prototypes
|
Yes, this image was unearthed from the bowels
of my floppy disk box and yes, these were the Sideshow Toy prototypes. Uh... and
yes, there was a 99. But let's study a few details here. Note that the Chief
looks very very real.... he looks like he's about to jump off the page, drop his
golf shoe phone and pinch the bridge of his nose. Max is looking rather smirky
in his camel hair sports coat and khaki slacks. Kudos to Sideshow for moving
away from the 70s wardrobe. Finally, there is the 99 that was never to be. Her
outfit is rather cute, although the gun should be red. Ms. 99 also has the head
of Marlo Thomas rather than Barbara Feldon. This could be the second time these
two ladies have been confused.... I dunno. Seriously, had Sideshow decided to
pursue making a 99, I would hope this was only the rough sketch. Rooted hair
would also do the doll justice if 99's being depicted in her long hair years.
It is indeed a bummer there isn't a 99
and I certainly hope Sideshow considers making one. In fact, it would be all
well and good if a few other sets were released. Here's my wish list: A 99 and a
Hymie set -imagine having a Hymie figure and opening up his gear box... A
Siegfried and Shtarker set -fun fun fun and all decked out in leather... Agent
13 -complete with a mailbox!
|
|
OOAK: Can you say Amanda's Hack Job?
One of a Kind Barbies (OOAK) are all the rage on Ebay. Yep, there's an
OOAK Barbie for everything, so why not an OOAK Agent 99 doll? I also thought
with my Max and Chief dolls sitting on their shelf and looking rather lonely, it
would be nice for a woman's touch.
Well, this is what I came up with and let me tell you it was a
chore!
99 got a thorough haircut -which was a tad unnerving. I
could probably do to take a bit more off, but lets pretend this is the 99 at the
end of season three --she had a bob, but it was a bit longish.
Much of my time was
spent perusing Target, Big Lots and varying dollar stores looking for just the
right clothes and accessories.
Dressed in black leather, 99 comes with a red gun and her very
own classified information! 99's gun and "Top Secret" folder actually
came from a GI Joe. The gun was originally black, but I painted it red.
COPYRIGHT © 1999-2023 BY AMANDA
HAVERSTICK.
|
